CRINGE PIC: JANUARY: DID YOU SAY SPOONGE BATS?

 

Canada’s PM Justin Trudeau (JT)

Ukrainian President Volodymyr (“Vulva”) Zelensky (VZ)

Taped during a “hot” video cam incident at a recent NATO conference

 

JT: “…no, silly, it's spelt b-a-t-h. Bath. Like a shower except you’re lying dow…”

VZ: “What is dis spoonge bats? Shower? I wash last week. Use soap. Lotza sud. Change brefs and my sock. Why say you dis? Does I stink or somend? Tell truit, Jussy.”

JT: “No-no, sweety, it’s not th…”

VZ: “Shhh! Nozee parkass hears you!”

JT: “You're adorable, Vulva! I want to jump across this table and love bite you all over! You’re my Slavic teddy bear. I want to squeeze you so hard…”

VZ: “Hey-hey, Jussy! Nots so loudz! Dis NATO meets. They spy everwherez. Is dis cameras on? Red laght or greens. Which mean on?”

JT: “Never mind those silly old cameras. They don’t know we’re here. Nobody does. They stopped paying attention to me a long time ago. They let me know when its time for the group photo. That’s about it. We’ve got oodles of time.”

VZ: “But Blinkson here. He my buddy. Tony. He talk Biden send me moneys. I buy house in Hamptons. Very nice. Big garage. My wife collect car. She nuttz on Bugatti. All time she drive. She drive tofass for me! Ha-ha!”

JT: “I don’t know why you mention her? She’s hardly with you anymore…”

VZ: “Hey, we have kidz. You know how it go. You divorze what-her-names, yeah? The one with saxy calf legs?”

JT: “Yes-yes. I’m a free bird, Vulva. At last! As free as a bird. That’s me. I can fly around all day and sing my songs. But will anyone listen? Will they? I…” [Sobs. Starts singing  "Leonard Cohen's, "Like a bird on a Wire".]

VZ: “Hey-hey. Jussy, keeps down! People watch.”

JT: “I don’t care, I don’t care! Why are you worried about what other people think? Don’t you know they all hate you? They ignore me and hate you. They…. Oh, what difference does it make? Why should I…why should we…” [Sobs again]

VZ: “What say you dis? What say you they all hates me? Why? Me they like. I make joke. Tell Ukrainey poke-poke jokes. They laugh. I makes laugh. Why say you dis?”

JT: “Dear-heart, don’t you know they’re all laughing at you? Can’t you see that?”

VZ: “No. Not true. I in Washingtones. I speak with Bidens. He tell me call him ‘Joe-Joe’. He laugh my jokes. I laugh. Give me money. I play round with him in hot tub for while. He all rinkles. Old man. Big dong, but too manyz rinkles! Ha-ha!”

JT: “He hates you worst of all. The CIA wants to get rid of you. To replace you with someone who can talk with Putin. They want to move on to China.

VZ: “I like Chinese. They make good noodles.”

JT: “Be serious, Vulva! For one minute. Can’t you see they’re throwing you to the wolves? Most of the time the cameras aren’t even turned on when you’re speaking or signing these stupid bilateral defense treaties with everybody. They’re not worth the paper they’re written on. You’re yesterday’s news. You’re a fool to trust them! A mad fool. But...you’re my fool, my…” [More tears]

VZ: “Hey Juss, not cry. Cum’on don’t cry. Tell me ‘bout dis spoonge bats. How play you this game? Cum’on. Here hanky.” [JT blows nose].

 JT: “Alright. Alright. If you want. It’s like musical chairs. Have you ever played that game as a kid?”

VS: “I thinks.”

JT: “It’s a bit different in my country. In this version, there are only two chairs. When the music starts we circle round and round and when the music stops we grab our seats and sit down.”

VZ: “Yah-yah. We play this too.”

JT: “Well, in this game we don’t pull away any chairs. We go round and round and when the music stops we sit down. But this time the quickest one to be seated takes off a piece of clothing.”

VZ: “Huh? I never heard dis. How you win dis game?”

JT: Well, the one who takes off all their clothes first gets to have a sponge bath from the loser.”

VZ: “But how dis a lose, Jussy? Seem me like pokey-poke funs for both. Spoonge bats. Hey, I like both way! You dirty mindz, Turdoze. Very dirty mindz.”

JT: “Now you’re talking, sweet-cheeks!”  

 

😁This “hot video” transcript speaks for itself. Besides, I like make fun at dis c**ts.

 

Cheers, Jake.