RANT: WHAT A DIFFERENCE A WAR MAKES!

IN OCTOBER 2021, a major tranche of confidential, financial records sourced from a variety of institutions around the world and dubbed the “Pandora Papers”, was leaked to the ICIJ (International Consortium of Investigative Journalists).* Many of the most popular destinations for 'offshore' capital were revealed: Tax havens like the Virgin Islands, Bahamas, Dubai, Monaco, Belize (even South Dakota, of all places!) Billionaires and bureaucrats, despots and diplomats, global elites from over one hundred countries,⁺ got name-shamed along with their favourite bolt holes, into which they continue to stash their gotten and ill-gotten gains. Hundreds of billions of dollars are squirrelled away each year by these grifting A-listers. Nice work if you can get it!

JEEZE LOUISE! FHS! If these sociopaths and ne'er-do-wells can have offshore bank accounts and slip-slide away from their countries' taxmen, then  all of us should be able to freely launder our money, too.

 

SO, I WAS NOT SURPRISED to learn that President Zelensky has his own wealth management portfolio, as revealed in the Papers, that he developed during his long association with Ukrainian billionaire Ihor Kolomoysky who, until recently, has been the go-to guy Mr. Zee consulted for all things financial. It's always good to have an oligarch or two on speed dial, don't you agree?

It was in October, 2021 when the "Pandora Papers" were published, and President Zelensky, who came into office (in 2019) with a huge mandate to "end" corruption in his country, stumbled off the starting blocks. He face-planted, laughing all the way, no doubt, into piles of cash, which grew ever-higher once the U.S. decided to wage its proxy war against Russia in Ukraine. IN OTHER WORDS, Zelensky started under a cloud, with political commentators skeptical about his bonafides  as a reformer, with many seeing him, as time went on,  as just another oligarch-in-the-making. Just a typical Ukrainian politician, in other words.

FAST FORWARD A YEAR, to late 2022 and this same elite money-grubber seemed on the road to saint-hood! He was the talk of the town during the entire year since the Russian invasion, his every word, no matter how vapid and self-serving, quoted as gospel. Adored by millions, he walked the red carpet where ever he went. Now, I'm sure Mister Zee has got everything back on the straight and narrow again  and the billions of dollars in weapons and financial boodle aide he's received have been put to good use. With government coffers worldwide (well, in the collective West, at least) turning on the money spigots to send boatloads of cash

   Saint Volodymyr

¹ into what has been called the "most corrupt country in Europe", and with nobody in particular checking to see if anyone's got their finger on the scale, well, what could possibly go wrong? But in the year or so since the Pandora Papers came out in late 2021, Volodymyr had learned his lesson. 

 

NOT that anyone would ever accuse the Ukrainian president of using his country as his personal ATM. Not Volodymyr! After all, who doubts the integrity of 2022’s “Person of the Year”,² chosen by Time magazine? He must be doing something wrong right. Right?  What a difference a war makes! Everybody should have one. President Zelensky has gone from bag-man to beatific in less than a year!  Couldn't it have happened to a nicer guy....³

"As ever," says the boatman, "time will tell."

 

Cheers, Jake.

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* 2016’s “Panama Papers”,  revealed financial skulduggery of global elites—kings, presidents, rock stars, billionaires—you name it! The leak originated from the Panamanian law firm of Mossack Fonseca with branches in Hong Kong, Zurich, and dozens of other places. It was the largest tranche of leaked financial documents until 2021's "Pandora Papers".

 

⁺ There are 195 countries in the world today. Let's see if we can get the remainders onboard by the end of the decade. GO TEAM!

 

1. Canada has committed a cool billion dollars in weapons and humanitarian assistance to Zelensky's slush fund Ukraine.

   

2. Check out Time Magazine's Man of the Year for 1938 to fact-check the mag's oracular score card. 
 

3. Just wanted to do a shorty here. I felt like carping a bit because I'm fed-up listening to the gravelly voiced, scruff-bearded Mr ZEE, in his faux front-line, olive-drab outfits, banging his war drums and begging bowls all over the place. Any hope for democratic change that the people of Ukraine had from this shill for oligarchs  politician when he was elected a couple of years ago is now drowned in the flood of arms and aide money swamping their shattered country. 

Though I am encouraged, somewhat, that the Zelensky 'charm' is fading to a certain extent. The former actor-turned-politician was recently snubbed from speaking, via video-link, at the recent Academy Awards show for the second year in a row. Ouch! That's gotta hurt! Could his star be waning?

IT SHOULD BE NOTED, however, that Volodymyr did speak late last year at a Joint Meeting of Congress in Washington where he received a standing ovation, which must bode well for his presidency. Right? Oh, wait...in 2020, Juan Guaidó (who?) got the same hoo-ha. Just sayin'.

"Pandora Papers" from The Guardian, October 3, 2021

 

 

 

 

    

 https://www.occrp.org/en/the-pandora-papers/pandora-papers-reveal-offshore-holdings-of-ukrainian-president-and-his-inner-circle

 

   "Everybody! Fu*k Off! Not you, Woofie.”

 

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